CIVIL DISCOURSE: An Agenda of Joy

Posted on by Editor

EDITOR’S NOTE:  I’m asked a lot about what I read – and I read a lot – several dozen different publications and especially a lot of blogs on Substack. Here’s one of my regulars, Joyce Vance’s “Civil Discourse.” Usually she’s providing recaps about the various legal cases, but every so often she throws in her chickens – and guidance about how we take care of ourselves through all the turmoil – the marathon for democracy. There’s a link to her Substack below.

By Joyce White Vance (2/14/26)

Last Saturday, I wrote to you about Stress and Chickens. It’s a stressful time. Tonight, I’m following up on that with your ideas for beating the angst.

When I wrote to you last weekend, I was thinking about the fact that we live in a time where there’s always something. These days, sometimes three things between midnight and 6 am. We all need to stress less. The chickens are always cute and relaxing. They are such ham bones, and they make me happy. I also mentioned a woman from the Charlotte Indivisible chapter who mentioned she and her friends keep an agenda of joy that they use, and that idea has stayed with me.

Toot not only has amazing side eye, but she can also convince you she hasn’t had her fair share of the treats when in fact, she’s eaten most of them.

Last weekend, I asked you to share how you were handling stress in the comments, in hopes we could help each other compile our own agendas of joy. ICE was still occupying Minneapolis, and we were all wearing thin. But your suggestions were just what I needed to read, full of happiness and insight into how important it is to take care of ourselves right now.

So, I’ve compiled a list of your ideas—we are definitely a community of animal lovers! But more than that, we are smart about playing the long game. We understand we’re running a marathon for democracy, not a sprint, and that means taking good care of ourselves.

How Civil Discourse readers said they’re handling stress right now:

1) Spending time with animals (the #1 most-mentioned coping tool) as an instant nervous system reset.

  • Cuddling/petting dogs and cats (including “borrowing” a friend’s dog, or saying hi to dogs out in the world), hanging out with chickens or looking at chicken photos for a quick dose of calm (I can definitely keep the chicken photos coming)
  • Watching wildlife: birds at feeders/bird baths, squirrels, deer, bunnies, even neighborhood turkeys (This crazy expensive birdfeeder/camera, which someone suggested, is on sale right now and I think I might try it)
  • Animal-related routines that force a reset: daily dog walks, barn chores, caring for foster kittens, etc. and therapy-style moments: bringing dogs to campuses/hospitals, or offering “puppy fixes” to stressed students
  • Being around bigger animals too: horses, goats, alpacas, pigs (“anything non-human”)

2) Movement + Fresh Air (even when it’s freezing)

  • Walking (often daily) and making it a non-negotiable: around the block, on trails, or along a lake/shoreline, hiking and trail running to get fully absorbed in scenery + effort
  • Cold-weather movement: cross-country skiing, snowshoeing, even “bundle up and go anyway” walks
  • Gym time, workouts at the Y, rowing/weights, Pilates, Yoga and related practices (including chair yoga, hot yoga, qigong)
  • Other outdoor breaks: kayaking, rafting, riding a horse to the river, beach time when possible

3) Escapist reading and comfort TV

  • Reading to escape (especially mysteries and “other places/other times”), fiction as a mental vacation (mystery, detective, cozy mystery, fantasy, spy novels, historical fiction)
  • Series in particular: the predictable comfort of returning to familiar characters and worlds, older classics for refuge (Jane Austen came up more than once) and don’t forget audiobooks for hands-busy or eyes-tired days, and reading at night (or in the middle of the night) instead of doomscrolling
  • Comfort TV, especially watching sports as an antidote (Olympics were mentioned constantly, also basketball, gymnastics, curling, Super Bowl)
  • British/Korean/other international shows as “safe escape” viewing and rewatching familiar series (favorites like The West Wing, Schitt’s Creek, ER, etc.)
  • Movies at a local theater/art house as a deliberate “leave the house and focus” reset and silly/wholesome internet viewing: baby laugh videos, funny animal videos, light YouTube channels

4) Making things with your hands

  • Knitting (More on this later this week—have you seen the resurgence of the red protest hats from WWII-era Norway?), Crochet (granny squares, scarves, blankets, amigurumi)
  • Quilting and sewing (piecing quilt tops, finishing quilts, mending/repair projects), needlepoint, macramé, beading, jewelry-making
  • Origami (including folding with friends at a library), puzzles and games that fully occupy attention: jigsaws, Mah Jong, Scrabble, Qwirkle, etc., and woodworking

5) Art, creativity, and learning new skills

  • Drawing classes, Watercolor and painting, Pottery/sculpture/fabrication and studio time
  • Writing (poems, memoir-ish projects, novels, ancestry books, daily journals)
  • Taking classes in non-political topics (horticulture, ecology, conservation, poetry, music)
  • Learning or returning to instruments (piano lessons came up a lot, also ukulele, drumming)

6) Music as medicine

  • Listening to music (jazz stations were a favorite, also classical and Broadway)
  • Playing music (Bach/scale practice, chamber music, rehearsing with friends, open mic nights)
  • Singing in choirs or choruses, many described it as both calming and energizing
  • Dancing (from Bad Bunny dance breaks to “walk to disco beats” when dancing isn’t possible)

7) Cozy comforts at home

  • Cooking and baking (cookies, soup, comfort meals, sharing food with friends/neighbors—I’ve been doing a lot of this!)
  • Tea/coffee rituals; sitting by the fire or fireplace; warm blankets, scented candles/seasonal fragrance; hot baths; sauna/infrared sauna; a few even ordered a hot tub
  • Small “treat” comforts: chocolate came up a lot; wine/martinis/chardonnay did too

8) People, community, and the ‘we’re not alone’ effect

  • Hosting or attending small gatherings (birthday parties, potlucks, watch parties, lunches with friends)
  • Spending time with family, especially grandchildren (and “granddogs”), walking with friends, venting with a spouse/partner, or having a group text for humor and support
  • Acts of kindness: saying hello on trails, helping strangers, bringing flowers, buying coffee for others

9) Doing something purposeful (volunteering, civic action, helping others)

  • Showing up: protests, sign-waving, overpass banner actions, organizing local events, volunteering and community work (League of Women Voters, advocacy groups, Audubon, school board/city meetings)
  • Democracy “small actions”: postcards, voter registration, calling reps, donations, boycotts, “ICE watch” efforts
  • Mutual aid style help: supplying shelters, supporting immigrants, building accessibility ramps, baking fundraisers

10) Mindfulness, faith, and perspective practices

  • Prayer/faith practices and the habit of “handing worries over” at night
  • Gratitude lists (5–10 things each morning) and intentionally noticing beauty, nature-based perspective: mountains, sunlight moving across the day, sunsets/sunrises, the moon, big-sky moments
  • Zoomed-out perspective tools (history, space images) to make the daily chaos feel smaller

11) News boundaries, rest, and “permission to step back”

  • Reducing news exposure (or switching from TV to reading so it feels more controllable)
  • Turning off phones/computers for chunks of the day, or setting an evening “devices off” rule, taking deliberate doomscroll breaks and returning to the present moment
  • Sleeping more, napping, or simply letting yourself rest without guilt when your body demands it

Bob and I got away for a quick break for Valentine’s Day. We aren’t big on cards and flowers, but we’re going snowshoeing and enjoying our time outdoors and away. We decided against eating out after a fun, but busy day and Bob decreed that it’s pie night. We’re having cherry pie and ice cream for dinner, an unusual approach, but I appreciate quirky (and we have good champagne too).

There are so many good ideas on the list. I hope it helps everyone find something new to try and add to their own personal agenda of joy. It’s good to feel the love and avoid the hate that’s being spewed right now. However you celebrate, Happy Valentine’s Day.

We’re in this together,

Joyce

https://joycevance.substack.com/