By Dan Haag The barista’s eyes were hollow as she handed me my order. “Have a nice day,” she said, her gaze tracking to the growing, restless line behind me. “How are you doing?” I asked softly. “I’m in a living nightmare,” she replied, shaking her head and gesturing at the “Face Mask Required” sign on the counter. “I don’t…
Category: The Littoral Life
The Littoral Life: Your Questions Answered, Part Deux
By Dan Haag Hate watching the news? Tired of being cooped up in your house? Had enough of mouthing swear words at people from behind your face mask? Well, you’re in luck! It’s time for another edition of “Your Questions Answered” here on The Littoral Life. Because the last edition of “Your Questions Answered” was widely read by 12 or…
The Littoral Life: Masked Intentions
By Dan Haag The last time I checked in with a column, it was nearly Valentine’s Day and 2020 was humming along quite mildly, thank you very much. Now, I look at the calendar and wonder what time/space-continuum I’ve wandered into since little Cupid fluttered his wings and flew away. In case you’re wondering how I’ve been spending my time,…
The Littoral Life: Don’t forget the little guy
By Dan Haag On a Monday afternoon in the Warrenton Costco, I made the fateful decision to wander into the aisle that houses the toilet paper. I didn’t really need any, quite honestly. Because I have lived on the Oregon Coast for nearly 30 years, I’ve made a habit of keeping extra stocks of essentials on hand in case of…
The Littoral Life: Sweaty little thing called love
By Dan Haag I’m just going to come right out and say it: I love Valentine’s Day. I know there’s a very vocal segment of the population that gripes every year about how it’s a fake holiday, created by greeting card companies for the purposes of buying cards and flowers. Jay Leno famously referred to it as “Extortion Day.” Other…
The Littoral Life: Your questions answered
By Dan Haag I’ve always felt that one of my greatest strengths is offering unsolicited advice. Just ask any parent who has sat their crying child next to me in a restaurant or on an airplane. One of the side benefits of writing a wildly popular column is that, from time-to-time, I receive emails from readers seeking answers from me…
The Littoral Life: The Scroogies
By Dan Haag There’s no denying it. Christmas is rolling my way like an out-of-control, twinkle-light festooned locomotive. The signs are everywhere: stores are decorated festively, yards are populated by terrifyingly enormous inflatable likenesses of Frosty and Santa, and the government has released Mariah Carey and Michael Buble from their cryogenic stasis so they can regale us with roughly fifty…
The Littoral Life: What’s in a name?
By Dan Haag On a recent lazy November afternoon, I listlessly pushed a cart through Fred Meyer. How I’d ended up there was a bit of a mystery. I distinctly recalled telling my wife earlier in the day that I had no desire to go shopping and would rather go to the beach. She’d agreed and I’d thought the matter…
The Littoral Life: The winded warrior
By Dan Haag 35 years ago, one of the greatest films of all time was being viewed across America. I am, of course, referring to the Ralph Macchio classic, “The Karate Kid.” It was a film that had it all – action, thrills, romance, Elisabeth Shue. Best of all, it delivered what the title promised: karate. For those of you…
The Littoral Life: No particular place to go
By Dan Haag Nothing says road trip like long, empty stretches of highway. Just you, a car, and miles of blacktop. Additionally, nothing says road trip like desperately searching for a place to pull over when nature calls. A full bladder can sidetrack you mercilessly, taking you to hideous roadside places you would normally hurtle past like Wile E. Coyote…
