By Deb Montgomery, Certified Life Coach
I am twelve years old taking a swimming lesson in Wolf Lake, Ontario, Canada. My instructor is telling me about the Dead Man’s Float. She is telling me that if I get shipwrecked and the vessel is in pieces and I can’t get my arms up on something that floats in the open water, the Dead Man’s Float will help me stay alive until rescue can come or until I can make my way to land. It’s a way to stay afloat when trying to swim to shore or swim anywhere. It’s a way to stay out of panic or wait for rescue when trying to swim normally or quickly would exhaust someone. She is saying, “If you do this, you’ll last longer and you’ll be ok until someone or something can help you find ground, or land, or another vessel.” “Or, until you can actually dead-man’s-float your way to shore.” In a song I wrote called Little Ship, I wrote, “This little ship, sinking seems to be, We’ve tried so hard Lord, but she’s taking on the Sea. Help us see.” Lately I hear a lot of folks talking about how lost and floaty and shaken they feel. And I wonder if there’s something about the Dead Man’s Float as a metaphor that can teach us something about how to get from here to there, from feeling like we are drowning to feeling a sense of agency and hope.
The Dead Man’s Float, sometimes called the Survival Float or the Jellyfish involves relaxing your body face down in the water. I recommend learning this in a pool first! While floating face down, you inhale to gain some buoyancy. When you need to exhale, you lift your face up for a good breath and resume with the relaxed position in the water. Doing this could possibly allow you to last a long time because you don’t have to use your energy or exert yourself.
(Of course in the Pacific Northwest hypothermia would be a thing but we will pretend the water is warm!)
As I connect out in the world, many folks feel as though they are floating, feeling lost, and aware that they don’t see any rescue coming anytime soon. Some folks tell me that, somedays, they feel like they are drowning. Though most of us may not ever need the dead man’s float to stay alive at Sea, it might be worth thinking about the float as a useful metaphor.
I wonder what your dead man’s float for these days and times? I’m curious what allows you to rest and not exert yourself at times. What are you able to imagine you could do to give your heart and soul a way to not drown in the middle of things?
For me, I know that time on the beach or beside water is a way of deepening my breath. Other times, it’s taking a run with my dogs and coming across a rabbit or two. They make me smile. (They make one of my dogs drool. Scary emoji) Maybe for you it’s a video game (but hopefully not hours!) Sometimes, for me, it’s a coffee date with an old friend where we take some sweet time to have a good gab. We might laugh or cry or just catch up with each other’s hearts. I feel like I can breathe deeply after that. I feel like I can be lost even when I don’t see any rescue coming and that I will be ok for a while. Sometimes it’s taking some items off a to-do list or reconsidering what I think is urgent. It’s amazing how a little patience can bring some deeper wisdom to what I think matters. We can’t always just keep swimming. We come with a need for rest, for pause, for breathing more deeply. We come into the world needing to be held sometimes. And there are many different ways to be held. Sometimes the water can actually work with you and hold you while you stop working so hard.
If you feel like you’re exhausted, or you don’t know how you’re going to swim to land because you’re tired, or if you simply can’t see land right now, maybe think about some ways you could use the metaphor of an old swimming technique as a guide to how to work a little less hard, struggle less furiously, and find some way to let the water work with you.
Deb Montgomery is a Songwriter and Certified Life Coach.
www.debmontgomerylifecoach.com
www.debmontgomery.com