By Butch Freedman
… and one guy.
Our little community has an ongoing book club. We meet once a month to discuss that month’s book selection. It’s a fun time, low pressure, everybody gets a chance to give their opinion and to explain why they feel the way they do. There are on occasions strong differences of opinion, but I’ve yet to see anyone upset or angry. Laughter seems to be the most prevalent emotion. Oh yeah, and there are snacks. If possible, the snacks are related in some way to the book we’re discussing. “A Gentleman in Moscow” for instance included an array of Russian treats and a nip of vodka. Like I said, a fun group. And the books we’ve discussed, a mixture of fiction and non-fiction, all to one degree or another, are excellent reads. “The Bluest Eye” by Toni Morrison is one of my favorites so far. The local Tillamook Library has been a great aid to our group as they provide a wide array of book club sets—ten copies of a book, along with biographical material and commentary, that are available for groups to check out. So impressed and grateful was our group, that we donated funds to extend the library’s selections and purchase three more sets.
And yes, as my playful title implies, I am the only regular male member of the book group, along with 10-14 women. I enjoy my role as defender of the patriarchy (a running joke), and occasional contrarian. Every book club needs one — contrarian that is, not misogynist. But I do wonder why I am the only guy. Do men not read as much as women? Could be, though I haven’t looked in to any research on that front. I suspect the reading rates are about the same. I have a friend in Portland who belongs to an all-male book club. That’s weird also. Maybe it’s all about socialization. I think it’s safe to say, that women enjoy spending time together and talking more than men do. Men around here like to go fishing together. That way they don’t have to talk to each other very much. Us boys tend to be less in touch with our feelings, or at least in our ability to share them. Of course, these are all sweeping generalizations, but that’s what I do. I’m not saying guys can’t go deep. It’s just a lot less common. We also don’t tend to make friends as easily as women do. Maybe we buy into our own stereotypes—strong and silent— passed down to us by our fathers.
For myself, I’ve always enjoyed the company of women, more than that of men. I also love books and writing; that’s why I’m a participant in the book club. That, and the snacks. And I get to read books that I might not have otherwise. I think all of us enjoy that aspect of a book club. Next month’s selection will be a re-reading (for most) of “The Great Gatsby,” a classic of American lit. I’m going to lead that discussion. I’m interested to see if the group thinks “Gatsby” by F. Scott Fitzgerald, set in the Roaring 20’s hold up to a 2026 reading. As an ex-American Lit professor, I’ll try desperately to hold back my pedantry and push the discussions to the group—with perhaps some gentle prodding. Maybe the women will even bring along their spouses. They have opinions too.